The Dangerous Power of Being 'Right': Is It Time to Let Go?

By: Stuart Knight (Founder and CEO) | March 4, 2025

Let’s go deeper with a question and have a self connection shall we?  Here it is?  If you believe it, does it make it true?  Let me explain.  

One of the hardest things I’ve ever had to do in my life is create space and time for people who don’t agree with me.  Because quite frankly, I really enjoy thinking I’m right.  Like, a lot.  I find it so convenient.  You know, it allows me to feel smart, and confident and sometimes, even a little superior.  And the part I like the most about thinking I’m right is how it spills over into other parts of my life.

Because, if I’m right about THIS thing, I must be right about other things.  I must be right about the way I approach my relationship, about the people I’ve chosen to be friends with, about the way I cast my vote, about the way I deal with my clients, about the way I parent, and right in my belief that there’s something a little off with Will Smith.  Because on the flip side, not being right about all of these things would suck.  It would mean I have to look at myself in the mirror, and see things I don’t want to see.  It would mean I have to change, or work harder, or make sacrifices.  And who the hell wants to do that?

Well, all joking aside, I actually do want to do that.  Sure, it doesn’t feel good, but I’d much rather be UNCOMFORTABLE while growing than be comfortable while not.  You know, this reminds me of when I first started out as a professional speaker.  I was in my early 20’s and convinced that I was AWESOME.  And then one day I decided to watch videos of myself, and I’m not gonna lie.  It was painful.  Sure, there were some good moments, but there were so many areas that needed improving, and all I wanted to do was turn off the screen.  But I knew that if I was going to have the career I wanted to have that I had to keep watching.  And taking notes, and making changes until I got there.  But I wouldn’t have gotten there, if I thought I was already there.

You know, I was recently watching Jane Fonda receive a lifetime achievement award, and during her speech, she spent a long time talking about all of the problems facing the world ranging from climate change, all the way to what she saw as the current political disaster happening in the United States.  While she talked, I couldn’t help but notice just how confident she was in her opinion.  Never once did she say, “This is what I think is happening”, but instead, “This is what I KNOW is happening”.  To the point where I honestly believe she would think you were crazy if you didn’t agree with her. 

And I honestly think she wants to make the world a better place, but will she get there if she is convinced that she is right in the way she sees the world?  She aims to sway public opinion on important topics based on a truth she believes. But is it true? Has she taken the time to really create space to listen to those who might see things differently than herself?  And if she did, could it potentially help her change the world in all the positive ways she wants?  I don’t know the answer to that question, but what I do know is that no matter who you are, it’s really hard listening to people who see things another way than ourselves.  

But what other path is there if we want to grow, to expand and to become better versions of ourselves?  Truly, what is it?  And why are we even here on this bouncing ball in the middle of outer space in the first place?  Are we here to just be right all of the time?  Is our purpose to convince ourselves that we’ve done nothing but make the right decisions?  Are we here to believe things so much to the point where no other truth could possibly exist?  Is there no area where you could improve as a parent, or as a leader, or as a friend, or as a partner, or as a boss or a coach?

Look, we can believe anything we want, but that doesn’t make it true.  To me, believing something just because it makes us feel good, or because it buys us membership to a group or because it gives us some sort of social credit only chains us down to where we are.  And if we are ever to rid ourselves of these chains, we have to trust that the truth will set us free.

Much love,

Stuart

PS. P.S. When you’re ready to have more meaningful conversations in your life, I encourage you to become a member of The Human Connection Group.  The only investment required is your time (only once a month).  Sign up for free HERE.

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